Wednesday, July 7, 2010


The gym at my apartment complex was unusually crowded tonight. Elliptical-ing next to me was a chubby boy who looked to be about fifteen years old. I didn't think anything of this until he began panting, hard, and muttering to himself. I feel like the gym is sort of like a crowded urinal: do not look, mind your own business. I couldn't help but realize, though, after a few moments, that he was berating himself, perhaps as some mode of motivation.

"You're so fat," he said, out of breath. "You're so stupid. Ugh."

I don't subscribe to the Jillian Michaels theory of "motivation"; I don't think anything good could come of being hateful toward oneself in the name of fitness, skinniness, whatever. I think this world needs a lot more love and acceptance in it, and it starts with ourselves. With that kind of support, we can do anything. We can change the world, even.

Basically I just wanted to ask you all to call a truce with your bodies. We all have moments when we find the way we look disagreeable. There are parts we don't like. There are parts we wish we smaller or bigger or tighter or just different, but it's beautiful and perfectly okay to be imperfect. We are all beautiful in our own ways, and it's time to stop treating ourselves like we aren't. Your body doesn't need to be punished. You don't need to be punished. So call a truce. Decide that it stops now: you can do that, you know. Write a peace treaty, effective immediately. Do it for you and for everyone you love and for everyone that hasn't realized they can do it yet.


Anonymous said...

Aw man. Poor kid. I hope that's not a regular occurrence for him.

Sydnie said...

That is so sad. :/ I feel like so many people beat themselves up over their bodies now-a-days (me included), and we should learn to accept ourselves more. Everyone is beautiful in their own way, and if we all looked the same, the world would be a very boring place!


Rachel Elizabeth said...

I used to be like that, only a couple of years ago. And being 36 weeks pregnant I often have moments where I berate myself for gaining 25 pounds with this pregnancy so far. It makes me so sad to think that other people struggle as I have a lot of the past.

Anonymous said...

I'm find with my tummy, but I hate my thighs. I'm a pretty small person, but definitely pear-shaped and my thighs have these stretch marks running all over them. I don't like swimming for this reason. I wish I could just get over myself and be confident, but I haven't reached that point in my life yet.

Anonymous said...

Gorgeous post! I completely agree. Cheers to kindness, to our bodies, ourselves and others.


Corrine/Frock And Roll said...

That made me feel so sad to think of someone, especially someone so YOUNG, saying that to themselves. Poor guy. But I loved this post and it was an excellent reminder to be kinder to ourselves.

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the inspiration. Poor kid. I don't watch any fitness shows because they always get to me no matter how hard I try. It's true that we all have parts we don't like. That's a part of the beauty in us.


Kimbirdy said...

totally! i wish health, not looks, was valued the most in our society.

Bec said...

Oh no! I want to give him a hug.
It's awful to think people go through their lives hating themselves so much for something so stupid.
Poor guy. And great post xx

Sarah Dawn Johnson said...

That story about the boy hurt my heart.

Elizabeth said...

this makes me so sad. Only when we love ourselves will be be able to make it change in a positive direction instead of getting stuck in a viscous cycle of self hatred.

your blog is wonderful. thank you!


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